The Luxury Gamer. Because such things exist.

For those of you with plenty of money but no social life to spend it on, Luxury goods manufacturer (a euphemism for "maker of useless expensive shit") has created a luxury gaming console. Compatible with Xbox 360, PlayStation 3 and PC, it's made of ostrich leather and dark blue lacquered oak, it's definitely something your average stupidly rich playboy can use to impress girls (until they realise that he still lives with his mum because he can't make himself a sandwich).
No word on pricing yet, but you'll be able to buy this on February 18 if you are rich, but still to socially awkward to find a gold digger.

Battle of the Mad Sporting Marketing Concepts

While stalking Acces Agency, I came across two separate ideas for marketing a sports brand, one for Nike and one for Puma. A normal person would feel no reaction and click the "Back" button. Me? I decide to do a battle

NIKE

Wow I Want To Do That Rating: 10/10. I mean, come on. It's a giant waterslide.
Reality Rating: 2/10 As you can see, it's computer generated, and I think that most organisations with something to do with the coastline would have something to say about a giant inflatable advert popping up across the cliffs.
Effectiveness Rating: 5/10 We're working on the assumption it was built here. Advertising is all about subliminal messaging. Unfortunately, here this could go both ways. It could either be "WHOAH, THAT WAS AWESOME SO NIKE MUST BE AWESOME!" or it could result in a totally consuming fear of giant red ticks. It's a 50% chance.

PUMA

Wow I Want To Do That Rating: 4/10. By day it is a national competition for who can keep spin-cycling the longest. While I guess that might give someone a chance at glory who would otherwise spend the rest of their lives wondering why they waisted so much time building up ridiculously strong legs, most people would go "Eeer...no thanks" if approached on the street and asked if they wanted to keep cycling for a ridiculous amount of time. By evening it transforms into a nightclub. An open air nightclub. It's cold at night. Who wants to go clubbing in a coat? On a shiny platform where everyone can see your drunk behaviour?
Reality Rating: 8/10. Puma just need say the word and it's go...after all, it's not a quantum leap away from Smirnoff and it's parties.
Effectiveness Rating: 6/10 When watching it on TV, it will seem great. "Look at all those tough men go" teenage boy will think. "All powered by Puma." And he will go to Puma. For the people involved, however, the dissapointment and pain will be so scarring they will probably never buy Puma again, and will possibly sue. Hell, I would.